Siege at the Hideout Day Seven
I am starting to think ransoming Animal Master was not a great idea.
Hack sent the ransom to Animal Master, demanding a terribly high amount of money by the end of March. I didn't specify an exact date because I wanted him to be nervous and early. The note instructed him to deposit the ridiculous sum to a Swiss Bank account where he has no hopes of ever tracking me. If he doesn't, then I will sell the diamond with all his blueprints encoded to the highest bidder.
In the meantime, I've kept Johnny Mars here at the lair. That's a lot like baby sitting your 14 year old cousin. Add in his mutant hormones and the whole waiting for the ransom bit is looking more like a test of my endurance. Let me tell you something about Johnny. The man does not like to sit still. Quiet moments of reading and upgrading Bots is deadly boring to him.
So far this week we have watched 16 hours of pro-wrestling. I didn't know there was that much wrestling to be seen. We have watched 'The Dirty Dozen' three times. On our LAN network, we have played endless hours of Unreal Tournament. Meals consist of pizza, giant sandwiches and buckets of fried chicken. Johnny listens to any music that has three guitars and a screaming lead vocal, or oddly enough, anything by Britney spears. It's a constant furnace of sound, violence and fried foods here.
I am not even going to mention why we assigned Johnny his own bathroom. The less said about his back hair clogging the drains the better.
Several times I have wanted to boot his butt out, but about eight times a day we spot flying monkeys hovering through the streets. Blackbeard knows what other animals he's got crawling out there looking for us. The last thing I need at this point is to let Johnny out and have him bring back home an entire army of cybered beasts looking to kill us all.
There is a bigger concern in all this. Angela and I have been trapped inside this lair for almost a week now with Johnny. His mutant pheromones are lingering every where now. Johnny was drinking Mountain Dew straight out of the two-liter bottle and I couldn't help think how sexy he looked. This morning, Angela wore make-up for breakfast. I have got to carve out some time and work on some sort of cure for his pheromones before he turns my hideout into an Axe commercial re-enactment.
Hack sent the ransom to Animal Master, demanding a terribly high amount of money by the end of March. I didn't specify an exact date because I wanted him to be nervous and early. The note instructed him to deposit the ridiculous sum to a Swiss Bank account where he has no hopes of ever tracking me. If he doesn't, then I will sell the diamond with all his blueprints encoded to the highest bidder.
In the meantime, I've kept Johnny Mars here at the lair. That's a lot like baby sitting your 14 year old cousin. Add in his mutant hormones and the whole waiting for the ransom bit is looking more like a test of my endurance. Let me tell you something about Johnny. The man does not like to sit still. Quiet moments of reading and upgrading Bots is deadly boring to him.
So far this week we have watched 16 hours of pro-wrestling. I didn't know there was that much wrestling to be seen. We have watched 'The Dirty Dozen' three times. On our LAN network, we have played endless hours of Unreal Tournament. Meals consist of pizza, giant sandwiches and buckets of fried chicken. Johnny listens to any music that has three guitars and a screaming lead vocal, or oddly enough, anything by Britney spears. It's a constant furnace of sound, violence and fried foods here.
I am not even going to mention why we assigned Johnny his own bathroom. The less said about his back hair clogging the drains the better.
Several times I have wanted to boot his butt out, but about eight times a day we spot flying monkeys hovering through the streets. Blackbeard knows what other animals he's got crawling out there looking for us. The last thing I need at this point is to let Johnny out and have him bring back home an entire army of cybered beasts looking to kill us all.
There is a bigger concern in all this. Angela and I have been trapped inside this lair for almost a week now with Johnny. His mutant pheromones are lingering every where now. Johnny was drinking Mountain Dew straight out of the two-liter bottle and I couldn't help think how sexy he looked. This morning, Angela wore make-up for breakfast. I have got to carve out some time and work on some sort of cure for his pheromones before he turns my hideout into an Axe commercial re-enactment.
posted by Shon Richards @ 3/23/2006 10:51:00 AM
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