A Pirate Queen Gives Thanks

It's that time of the year where people sit down and give thanks for those things they are grateful for the past year. Now I may be a super villain, but even I have a small amount of humility and gratitude. I would have more if it wasn't for the fact that I owe all of my success to myself.

First, I am grateful to my old boss Warstrike, who had the good luck to get killed in a freak hit and run, giving me the chance to loot his years of robberies. If it wasn't for his death, I would have never been able to afford that trip to the Caribbean and finace my current operations.

Second, I'm grateful to Frost Sting, who's high publicity factor allowed me to really make a huge impression on Comfort Bay when I defeated her.

I'm also thankful to my mom and dad, whos' love of all things piratey has given me the background and training to live a life of leisure and male strippers. Thanks Mom and Dad!

I'm more grateful than you know to Diva Pain's beauty secrets which have kepy my sails full, my hull round and my bow lean and mean if you know what I mean.

I'm very thankful to every boyfriend who doesn't call, drop by or send me a letter while I sit here alone during the holidays. It makes it easier to shoot, maim and plunder the rest of the year.

That about sums it all up. CookBot's got the Turkey roasting in the oven. BosunBot has hooked on his Rum Keg upgrade. 1stMateBot's went down the street and robbed the local bookie so it doesn't matter who won today's games. HelmsBot just gave the getaway van a new coat of paint. It's a lazy day and that's just the way I like it. No annoying family, no kids running around screaming, and no obnoxious friends eating all my groceries for free. It's just me, the Bots, the turkey and a DVD of Captain Blood.